So, I am no saint when it comes to my diet during pregnancy and, like anyone, I occasionally indulge in sweets and "naughty" foods. But, even before pregnancy I generally tried to eat healthy. I’m grateful that I’m one of those people that actually enjoys fruits and vegetables, so it doesn’t take as much effort for me as it might for others.
I’ve not had any weird cravings so far, but I am hungry more consistently then I was before I joined the ranks of the preggos. (Though, slightly less so now that I am in my second trimester.) So, I usually eat five to six small meals and snacks throughout the day.
In one of my first posts, I mentioned using a calorie tracker. This wasn’t to keep me from eating too much—it was the opposite! But I have since stopped using that. First of all, it was difficult to remember. Second, I found it more stressful than helpful.
So, instead I try and keep a food journal. Now that I no longer have a problem getting enough calories, my goal has been just to make sure that I am getting the variety of foods that I need. My midwife gave me a guideline of how much fruit, veggies, calcium, and protein I should be aiming to get in a day. (I can share that chart with you if anyone is interested.)
While I am certainly not perfect, I do my best. Here is an example of what my diet looked like for the last three days.
Breakfast: Half an avocado on a slice of 100% whole wheat toast with a fried egg on top
Mid-Morning Snack: Plain Cheerios with Honey Oat Cluster Granola added, a banana, blueberries, and fat free organic milk (see pictured to the left)
Afternoon snack: Apple
Lunch: Banza Chickpea Pasta with olive oil, garlic, avocado, spinach & kale, onion, eggplant, zucchini, mushrooms, cherry tomatoes, jalapeno, and a little parmesan on top (see pictured below)
Dinner: I went out to eat with my dad and my brother and they had a craving for wings, so I did the best I could with the menu and I got a turkey club sandwich on a ciabatta bun with fries. And I ate a couple of their wings
Breakfast: 2 fried eggs and a banana
Snack: a small bowl of the same vegetable pasta I had made the day before (see pictured to the right)
Lunch: pan-seared salmon with a honey, garlic, jalapeno, turmeric, and lime sauce (see pictured below)
After-lunch Snack: orange
Late afternoon snack: I finished off what was left of the vegetable pasta
Dinner: oven-roasted chicken with roasted potatoes
Breakfast: plain Cheerios with Honey Nut Oat Granola clusters added, strawberries, blueberries, banana, and fat-free organic milk (see pictured below)
Lunch: Half an avocado on a slice of 100% whole wheat toast with a fried egg on top
After-lunch Snack: Apple
Late afternoon snack: bowl of creamy chicken corn tortilla soup with about a third of a mini baguette
Dinner: romaine salad with carrots, peas, tomato, quinoa, red onion, black olives, and I was feeling a little bad so I didn’t have my usual balsamic and oil for dressing and I used about two tablespoons of green goddess dressing instead
As you can tell, I don’t hit every button every day. Protein and, especially, calcium are the areas where I usually fall a little short. But I am pretty good about getting my fruits, vegetables, grains, and good fats. Writing it all out helps me see that more clearly. For instance, seeing this, I might decide to add a glass of skim milk a day or maybe some pinto beans to my pasta on the days I don’t eat fish/lean meat… that should do the trick.
To make up for what I don’t get in my foods, I take supplements as well. In addition to my daily allergy medicine, I take:
But, I hope this is maybe of use to at least one person out there! Please do consult your doctor or midwife to find out what is best for you.
As usual, I would love to hear from you! What does a day in the life of your stomach look like? Do you take any extra supplements besides the normal prenatal vitamin?
photo by Gerd Altmann
So it’s been a while again! I had to take my computer in to be repaired. While it was in the shop, I relied heavily on my phone. I have several apps regarding pregnancy—What to Expect, etc... They show fun pictures of what my baby might look like at this stage of development and what size fruit they are now. But, they also have various articles. And, one of them was, “What is it safe to sip on?” The example questions in the tag line were, a glass of wine or an herbal tea...
From the get-go, the article pissed me off. Like any mainstream agenda, it proposed that not even the tiniest sip of alcohol was safe to drink. And, since of course you were skipping the caffeine--another annoying assumption--you might logically lean towards a nice cup of herbal tea as a replacement. But, it warned that this was just as dangerous! Supposedly, the herbs are a stronger concentration in tea, not FDA regulated, and even ginger tea was known to cause fetal hormonal abnormalities. WHAT?! Even peppermint tea was listed as unsafe and I had been drinking that nightly!
I panicked. As, I’m sure, many would. I text my midwife in a hurry and thankfully she got back to me straightaway. “Fake news!” she told me and I breathed a huge sigh of relief. “Unless you are drinking gallons, you should not worry.”
I thought to myself, not for the first time, no wonder pregnant women are so riddled with anxiety—we are told that pretty much EVERYTHING is a danger to our baby!
Why do we live in such a fear-based society? Pregnancy hormones induce enough anxiety on their own; they need no outside help! Everything you do as a pregnant woman is now subject to public scrutiny. Your body has become this vessel for societal critique and control. But what business is it of anyone’s but our own? The only other person that should have any opinion whatsoever about what I put in my body is, maybe, my husband… and that’s only because it’s his child, too. Otherwise, everyone else can buzz off!
These apps were cute, at first, or so I thought. But, now I see them for the source of endless anxiety and fear that they are. I look at the lists of potential articles to read and 80% of them are fear-based articles, with lists of all the things that could possibly go wrong.
Another one that keeps getting me are the articles about weight gain. As a Western culture, we obsess about weight control and dieting to the point where young girls are indoctrinated with these values straight out of the womb. So, it is difficult to divorce oneself from that mentality now that you are pregnant. Which is why, naturally, these articles gain a lot of traction.
How much weight is too much weight? They even have graphs where you can put in your pre-pregnancy weight and your current weight and it’ll show you whether you are gaining too much too soon. I gained 9 pounds in my first trimester, which by their statistics is too much. You are only meant to gain 3-7.8. But, that is very difficult to do when you are suddenly hungry ALL the time and the hormones in your system are slowing your metabolism down. So, not only are you eating more, but you are digesting less quickly. And, to top that off, you are fatigued all the time, so exercise most days is completely out of the question. Not to mention, you have practically doubled the volume of your blood, your uterus has grown, you're constipated, and your boobs are growing… all of which adds weight as well!
How about, instead of making women more body-conscious than they already are at this incredibly vulnerable stage of their life, these articles focused on encouraging women! Sure, have some articles about eating healthy... about how many cups of fruit you need each day, how much protein, and different recipe and meal plan ideas to meet those requirements. But they should mainly just say, "You got this, girl! You can do it!" Because, frankly, I think that's all we really need to hear! Our bodies are BUILT to do this...
We need articles encouraging women to trust their bodies. Not adding to the pressure that we already feel (and have felt for our entire lives!) about gaining weight.
“If you are eating a varied diet with healthy food and exercising occasionally… don’t worry about it. Your body knows what it needs.” That’s what my midwife told me.
It is advice that I took great comfort in: your body knows what it needs. It's a powerful reminder. Our bodies were designed to do this, to bring life into this world. And there can be no graph that is right for every woman, it’s just not possible. Some women gain all their weight at the start and then taper off. Others are too nauseous and don’t gain until later. Whatever your body is doing, it is okay. There can’t be a one-size-fits-all diagram for us. We are all different!
So I have deleted those apps. If I want a cute picture of what my baby looks like at 17 weeks, I can Google it. I am far, far happier for it.
So what else has happened since the New Year?
I finally had my first ultrasound!!
Obviously, you know there is a baby in there because you haven’t had your period and you have all this weird stuff happening to your body… hungry all the time, tired all the time… But there’s nothing quite like SEEING it to suddenly make it all the more real!
She put that tool on my tummy and, presto…there it was! I was surprised by how much definition it had already. I was expecting one of those highly pigmented blobs where you wouldn’t actually know it was a baby unless somebody told you. Yet this had the distinct shape of a head and a small little body underneath. And the technician pointed to where the two arms and two legs had formed. I was surprised, too, by how it made me feel. Tears of joy instantly swelled in my eyes. To actually see the life I was building was, frankly, magical.
I have also officially begun my second trimester! A HUGE call for celebration! Cue: balloons and confetti! While my first trimester was certainly no walk in the park—with all the cramping and the constant fatigue—I had virtually no morning sickness. So, honestly, I feel like I got off lucky comparatively. I know it could have been far, far worse.
At work once, a pregnant customer and I were relating experiences and when I told her I was ten weeks in (which I was at the time) she was like, “Wow! You’re awfully peppy for ten weeks!” (Inside, I was like “really… ? I don’t feel peppy!”) I took it not only as a great compliment, but also as a reassurance that all those days I didn’t feel full of life and I had zero energy were completely normal.
All of that is just to say that I am very glad to welcome this new phase, affectionately referred to as the honeymoon trimester. I am told my energy levels will return to normal and I won’t have to pee every twenty minutes (dear god, yes please!) I am over the moon to be able to get back to my daily exercises… when you become accustomed to working out, your body misses it when it’s gone. I am also excited to watch the baby bump grow! I already have a little one, though it’s my understanding that many don’t at this stage yet. I, however, am very short and, as my midwife explained, that means that what little growth there has been, has nowhere to go. But it'll be exciting to watch it develop into something that is unmistakably a baby. For now, it just looks like I've eaten a lot of food (which, let's be honest, I have!)
As this chapter closes, I think it calls for some reflection. When you speak to most about their first trimester (which is one of the worst) you understandably hear a lot of the negatives: exhaustion, nausea, achy breasts, etc etc.. And as I have discussed in previous posts, there is nothing wrong with sharing these. To share our hardships is part of what sisterhood is about! It helps us validate them knowing that we do not suffer alone. BUT, as usual, I feel like there is far more emphasis on the negative versus the positive. And that has its repercussions, too.
So here are some of the positive takeaways from my first three months:
I notice that I laugh more. Like considerably more. I’ve always been a giddy person, but these last three months have been FILLED with laughter. I have been extraordinarily giggly and happy. I’m sure that, in part, this is due to just the overall happiness and excitement I feel in regards to this big life change. But, I feel like it’s more than that, too. The kind of giggly laughter I get into is refreshingly childlike; almost as if I had stayed up all night and was punch-drunk tired. So it leaves me wondering if this is maybe as a result of a hormonal shift… Either way, it has been an absolute delight for me and all around me. Certainly, one of my favorite changes that I have noticed.
I also smell things more intensely. For some, this is a negative as strong smells then lead to strong feelings of nausea. But, personally, I really enjoy it! I like the enhancement of my senses. It makes me feel kind of like a superhero.
Since I am an overall pretty active person, this first trimester has been a humbling experience in that it has forced me to slow myself down to an entirely new pace. But, as a result, I have gotten a lot more time to take care of me! I have gotten very into the ritual of a nice, luxurious bubble bath. I add some ylang ylang bath salts, different essential oils (avocado oil is one of my favorites) and I usually enjoy some sort of face mask while I have a relaxing, long soak. The extra down time has also meant that I have been able to catch up on that big stack of books I’ve been meaning to read for forever. And, having a new puppy, I have gotten a lot of great bonding, one-on-one time with her.
While I miss working out on a daily basis, I have been enjoying our daily walks with the new pup. Yes, even in this bitter cold, which has surprised me too! There are woods near our home and they are absolutely lovely this time of year, shrouded in a thick blanket of snow and silence. We like to go off the beaten trail, a new direction everyday. And, while it’s not the same as a rigorous stint on my exercise bike, at least it’s some movement. More importantly, though, it's something I have had the time and the mindset to thoroughly enjoy.
These are just a few takeaways from the past months that I thought were worth sharing. As you all know, there is just far too much focus on the negatives of pregnancy. And this experience is scary enough without those reminders!
As usual, please share what your first trimester experiences have been. What positives were there for you?
Photo by Helena Lopes from Pexels
Sorry I’ve not posted in a while! A LOT has happened since the new year began!
My husband and I decided, after much debate, to adopt a dog! We had been all set to get one before we found out that I was expecting and that gave us pause. After we found out, we went back and forth on the issue for weeks… was it wiser to get one now, before the baby, or to wait until after?
Certainly, many weighed in with their opinions. Most were of the opinion that it was best to wait. We would have enough on our plate with a new baby. Which is a very valid point! One that we took under great consideration.
But, eventually, we decided that if we waited until after we had the baby, we wouldn’t have the time or the energy to train a dog for a very long while. And I’m an impatient person!
So we decided to adopt a slightly older puppy. She’s 5 months and already housebroken. A Siberian Husky, Newfoundland, and German Shepherd mix. By the time the baby comes around, the puppy will have grown comfortable in her new home. She’ll be trained and well-acclimated and we’ll be able to raise our child with a dog from day one. Which is something I, personally, think has a lot of benefits (I was born into a home with a giant German Shepherd.)
Honestly, I am so happy we decided to go this route. I think it was the right decision for our family. Not only because having a dog adds SO MUCH LIFE and beauty and laughter to a household... But, also because, given how labor-intensive a new dog is (which is to say VERY), I cannot imagine taking on this extra workload with a newborn in the house. There is just no way that I would have the energy or the patience to train a dog as a well as care for my new baby.
I’m sure other people feel differently, but I think every family should make decisions based on what is right for them.
I will write more very soon. But for now, I just wanted to send the update that I am still here. Still posting. And still keeping it positive!
Do you have any strong opinions about getting a dog while pregnant or waiting until after? If so, please share! Let’s start a dialogue!
So, ladies, you know I am all about positivity. But that is not to say that there won’t be hardship during this, our pregnancy experience. I know it won’t be all rainbows and roses… and pretending that’s the case is not what I mean when I say I want to keep the perspective positive.
I really like the framework of an adventure. An adventure is something that, I believe, has purely positive connotations—who doesn’t like the idea of embarking on a grand adventure! But, a true adventure cannot be so without a degree of struggle. There needs to be hardship to garner that great reward. Climbing a mountain takes extreme work and perseverance before you reach the peak and those breathtaking views! Indiana Jones had to battle Nazis and snakes and giant rolling boulders before he could get his treasure.
A real adventure requires strength—of both the body and the mind—and it requires perseverance. But, at the end, it will still have been a positive experience! One that you will look back on with such fondness.
That is how I am looking at pregnancy. This will be the greatest adventure I have ever embarked upon; the most intense challenge that I will ever have endured. So when I say I want to keep a positive perspective, it’s not to say that some days won’t be rough, because they will. It’s not say that some days I won’t curse the mountain I am climbing. But, that is what makes an adventure all the more rewarding! And, at the end, I will have my treasure and it will have all been worth it.
So, with that in mind, there has been one symptom that I have been experiencing with some relative intensity: cramping. It’s most likely my uterus expanding to make room for the baby. As I mentioned in a previous post, it has grown to the size of a grapefruit. It’s funny for me because “growing pains” are something that I have never experienced in my life (I’m pretty short) but I guess I have finally joined the club!
Most of the time, the cramps are similar to those of a really bad period. They come and they go, and sometimes I’m laid up on the couch all day with my heating pad. They’ve kept me up some nights and made me miss work others. Occasionally, they are extremely one-sided, and other days spread evenly across my midsection or lower back. And, of course, there are other days I don’t have any cramps at all!
My midwife told me that every woman is different. And, similarly with periods, some women have terrible cramps, others none at all, and of course there’s a whole spectrum in between. She said, “Some people just have very excitable (crabby) talkative and sensitive uteruses and some people never feel anything—no cramps with cycles and no growing pains in pregnancy.”
So I just have an incredibly crabby uterus! Which is why my husband and I have affectionately named it Sebastian, after the crab in Little Mermaid. Obviously a ridiculous little joke, one that pretty much no one but us finds funny…but making light of things helps.
Unfortunately, with this cold I’ve been fighting off, it’s been hard for me to differentiate between pregnancy symptoms and regular cold symptoms. For the past week, pretty much every day I wake up feeling like I have the flu. I am exhausted, my whole body aches, I’m nauseous, and I feel feverish… I’ve missed a lot of work. But, I’m hopeful that most of these symptoms are as a result of whatever virus I’m fighting off (it’s winter, after all, and there’s plenty of bugs going around.) If they are not, and this is just what the rest of my first trimester will be like, then I will cope. But I’m hoping it’s not!
I’d be curious to hear if anyone else has had similar experiences to mine? Did you have any cramping, if so, how severe? Did you feel like you had the flu?
To share hardship together and compare our experiences is not in defiance of the positive space I’d like to create here with my blog. As I mentioned above, I’m not trying to create some massive lie in which there will be no struggle—because pregnancy is an adventure and that takes hard work! But there’s a specific pessimism that I’m referencing when I say that I want to steer away from all the online negativity. And that’s the kind that actually creates anxiety, the kind that puts fear into the hearts of women who already have enough of that on their plate. I will talk about this in more detail in my next post (otherwise this one will be far too long!)
So for now, I’m signing off. I hope the analogy of an adventure is as fitting for you as it is for me. It fills me with a great sense of purpose and reward and it comforts me on the days that are a bit more of a struggle. Together, we adventurers soldier on! As always, please do share in the comments below or with the contact form above.
So I am supposedly most of the way through my 8th week now. I made the appointment yesterday for my first ultrasound, which I am incredibly excited for! I can't wait to find out just how far along I ACTUALLY am and to see that everything is developing as it should. Unfortunately, it’s not until January 9th—which I feel is such a long time to wait!! But, then again, patience has never really been one of my main virtues…
I have read that the embryo is now about the size of a raspberry (why do they always relate it to the size of a fruit?) Last week the baby had begun forming the small knobs that would develop into its arms and legs and ears. This week, it has begun to develop webbed hands and feet, and its tiny fingers and toes are beginning to differentiate. Also, its little heart have now formed! I had hoped that I’d be able to buy a stethoscope and listen to the heartbeat myself, but I guess you won’t be able to hear that for quite a while yet.
While I know it is still very early into my pregnancy, so these symptoms might still develop, I have not experienced any morning sickness. I’ve had moments of nausea, but nothing severe. They are easily remedied with some peppermint and/or ginger tea and capsules. I have, however, begun to feel FAR more lethargic. In part this is because I have been fighting off a nasty cold. But, I also know that it’s because my body needs so much more energy now; I am growing a life, after all, and it takes a lot of juice!
Sleeping in late is something I really struggle with, but I’ve been forcing myself to concede. I work evenings, so going to bed early isn’t really an option for my lifestyle unfortunately. But I’ve been making sure I get at least 10 hours. I was told my by midwife that women in their first trimester, on average, get about 12 hours of sleep. But, honestly, I’d have no time to LIVE if I did that! So, for now, I’m settling for 10 hours and, if need be, I’ll take naps.
My exercise routine has certainly suffered as of late due to the cold and the decreased energy levels. But I try to do what I can, when I can, and not kick myself about the times that I’m not up for it. We need to be kind to ourselves in the coming months and accept the things we cannot change.
I always knew that my exercise would need adjusting as I progressed further into pregnancy, so that’s why I am glad that I hit it into overdrive when I had the energy!
My uterus has grown to the size of a small grapefruit (again with the fruit analogies!) and, as such, I have found that my pants are becoming increasingly tighter. My midwife suggested that instead of buying a bigger size pair of pants, that I try these elastic belly bands instead. They go around the waistband of your pants and hold them in place so that you don’t have to fasten any buttons or zippers. I was skeptical at first, but they actually work great and are quite comfortable! I highly recommend! And, especially since I know maternity pants are not so far off in the horizon, it makes sense to save my money now and not buy more pants that I know I will soon grow out of.
So, ladies, that’s what my 8th week has been like, for the most part. I found that my 7th and 8th weeks were pretty similar, though markedly different from my 6th. What was yours like? Please feel free to share in the comment section below or with my contact form on the separate page.
“Have you never heard anyone speak positively about labor or birth before? If so, you are not alone,”
Ina May Gaskin writes in her AMAZING book Guide to Childbirth.
“There is extraordinary psychological benefit to belonging to a group of women who have positive stories to tell about their birthing experiences.”
That is what I want to create here. A sisterhood where we can share our positive stories.
If you are like me, you were raised on the back-foot of decades of terrifying depictions of labor in movies and other forms of pop culture. Women screaming in pain, red-faced in anguish, on the brink of death, crying, moaning… in the most excruciating pain of their lives.
I grew up on stories from my mother, detailing her 36 hour labors that would end in C-sections… and as a child, I used to (half) joke:
"I'm going to wait until medicine is advanced enough that they can just knock me out and then wake me up and hand me my baby." And when I was told that this actually used to happen, back in the days of ether, and that it was very dangerous and unhealthy, I would say, "Let's go back to that time. It sounds great!"
As I got a little older, I began thinking that a C-section sounded much better. "Just cut the baby out; what's wrong with that? Nice little scar across the tummy and my vagina will be perfectly in tact." (Of course, eventually when I had my gallbladder removed and I realized how difficult abdominal surgery actually is on the body--and that was just after a very simple, non-invasive laparoscopic surgery!--my opinion definitely changed!)
And, eventually, I decided that I'd much prefer adoption. Which is a sentiment I have heard countless friends of mine and other girls echo for the same reasons, to spare themselves the anguish of labor. Of course, I still love the idea--but for very different motivations! My husband and I might yet adopt one day, to give a child already born a loving home. But, not because I am scared of what childbirth will do to my body.
These decade-long catalogues of horrifying stories and fictional depictions that we were all exposed to are, I'm sure, based on truth. Plenty of women have had excruciating, awful labors. There’s a reason it is rightly called “labor” and not a synonym for “walk in the park”—it’s going to be the toughest challenge that we as women face (well, before the challenge of motherhood, that is.) But that does not mean that they are the only stories to tell.
I just bought this book by Ina May Gaskin and it is singing my song!! I could not recommend her any more highly--and I am only a couple of pages in! Already she writes, “So many horror stories circulate about birth--especially in the United States—that it can be difficult for women to believe that labor and birth can be a beneficial experience. If you have been pregnant for a while”—or in my case only 7 weeks!—“you’ve probably already heard some scary birth stories from friends or relatives. This is especially true if you live in a culture in which telling pregnant women gory stories has become acceptable.”
She goes on to quote a line from a Stephen King novella, “Believe me: if you are told that some experience is going to hurt, it will hurt. Much of pain is in the mind, and when a woman absorbs the idea that the act of giving birth is excruciatingly painful—when she gets this information from her mother, her sisters, her married friends, and her physician—that woman has been mentally prepared to feel great agony.”
Ina May writes, “The best way I know to counter the effects of frightening stories is to hear and read empowering ones.”
Ina May Gaskin, you are a wise woman!! Let us all take a page from your book!
So far, pretty much nothing. I haven’t experienced any real “symptoms” yet. I read that it’s common to feel lethargic and like you have no energy, but so far I feel great! Kind of the opposite, really, I feel like I have a ton of energy!
My boobs are becoming increasingly tender. And my husband and I feel like we can notice a slight difference in volume. So I've bought a few more supportive bras and that's helped with the soreness.
The only other difference I have experienced thus far is how often I am hungry! It’s like how I feel just before I get my period,but times that by ten! I don't have any cravings for specific things so far. It's just how often I need to eat. I can eat a meal and be hungry again in an hour. So I have been eating every couple of hours instead of having only 3 meals a day.
I have read that you actually aren’t meant to increase your calorie-intake by all that much. So instead of “eating for two” what I am attempting to do is eat smaller meals, but more frequently. I've adopted the grazing mentality. And I track my food intake on a calorie-counting app to make sure that I am getting enough nutrients.
As I mentioned before, I am a relatively active person. I exercise daily. So, while I have the flexibility and energy that I do now, I am kicking that into overdrive. Nothing too extreme, don’t worry all you who might message me with warnings. I’m not out there doing cross-fit. But I am increasing the amount of time on my exercise bike. Increasing the number of reps for pushups and sit-ups and other arm exercises. As well as the amount of time I spend stretching so that I can maintain my flexibility for as along as possible. I am a big fan of these low-impact, no-jumping HIIT workout tutorials on YouTube. So I do several of those a day, each one targeting different muscle groups, in addition to my exercise bike. They are amazing because the moves themselves are easy to do, but boy do you feel the results!
I know that there are a lot of people online who seem to be of the opinion that you shouldn't exercise while pregnant as it might be harmful for the baby. But, honestly, I don't buy into any of that. On the contrary, I think that staying active is vital. And I contribute it, in large part, to my increased energy levels.
I am fully prepared for the fact that my ability to do these exercises will change. The types of exercise I do will surely have to be adjusted. But I will continue to stay active and keep my body strong because that is what is going to help me through labor and also after.
And, of course, Kegel exercises, ladies ;)
That’s all for now folks. Stay tuned for further updates. And, as usual, I promise to keep it all positive!
Okay, so I just found out I’m pregnant. I’m, at best guess, about six weeks in. I’m 28 years old and this will be my first child.
I am by no means a fitness fanatic, but I exercise daily and I take care of my physical appearance and physique. I don’t like to think of myself as a vain person. But, like many, I find myself worrying about the changes my body will endure post-pregnancy. So, to reassure myself, I decided to search online for some uplifting, positive post-baby articles.
Man, was I disappointed! BIG MISTAKE!!!
I discovered that not only were there no positive post-labor stories for me to read, there were no positive pregnancy experiences either! It seems that every woman who has had a difficult labor or pregnancy wants to share their horror stories with you. I was met with article after article after article of horrific details! And when it came specifically to body-after-baby, these women wanted me to know that I will forever piss myself when I sneeze, how my boobs will eternally sag, and my stomach will be ruined with stretchmarks. These are not my words, but theirs.
What negative framework!!
I, of course, expect life to never be the same—but in a good way! A child is the most beautiful kind of change.
But these women wanted me to know that I would forever struggle with body-image issues. As if women don’t have enough of that pressure already!!
So I have decided to put some positivity out there into the internet-verse.
Be the change you wish you see in the world, right? Well I am going to try and be the positive light that I had hoped to find in the dark abyss that is the internet.
Misery does NOT love company!! But you know what does? Happiness!
Okay. So I am sure some of you mothers will read this and be like, “Ha! You are so naïve. You haven’t even had your first child. Just you wait…”
And perhaps you are right? But, perspective is everything. And I am convinced that with the right perspective and framework that I will be able to find some positivity to share. Not exclusively in regards to body-image, but about the whole pregnancy experience altogether.
And that’s what new mothers really need.
NO ONE WANTS TO READ ABOUT YOUR STORIES OF TEARING AND STITCHES!!!! Especially new mothers! We are already so scared, why give us that extra anxiety and fear? It seems so spiteful and, frankly, malicious for these women to dump all their misery on us like a garbage-truck.
Anxiety and fear aren’t good for you, full stop, period… I’d imagine they aren’t good for my unborn baby either.
So let’s flood the internet with happiness! With positivity! And warmth!
Please, share your UPLIFITING, REASSURING, HAPPY, AND POSITIIVE pregnancy, labor, and post-labor stories here!
And I will continue to share my experience as it evolves. But I promise that, even when there is hardship, as I know there will be, I will always frame it in the most positive light possible.
There is enough negativity in the world! Let’s let in the light!
I'm Kelsey! Proud Iowan native, world traveler, writer, wife to the most incredible husband, and now soon to be mother